“And we stayed friends for a long time, even though I
felt like she liked me, and even though I liked her. I couldn’t figure out why I felt like she
liked me, only to watch as she would go hang out with other guys. I’d be thinking, ‘I know she likes me!’ but I couldn’t figure it out.”
My friend sat, retelling the story of him and his now longtime girlfriend this afternoon. He laughed as he recounted the memories.
She went on to date other men as he went on with life, until
finally they were again brought together, where he finally learned her thoughts on what had been happening, er, not happening between them.
“She did like me,” he smiled, remembering, “she had liked me all along, but because
her best friend liked me, she took the way of loyalty and bowed out.”
Dating. Dating as
a Christian. It’s all very confusing and
there seems to be only a vague roadmap.
·
You can’t date him, because he dated your friend.
(Even though it was five years ago.)
·
He can’t date you, because his friend likes you.
(Even though you have no idea and, even if you did, wouldn’t reciprocate.)
·
Y’all won’t date for fear of messing up the
group dynamic. (Even though it’s only a possibility.)
I’ve watched for three years, trying to figure it out
what’s important and what’s not, and I still don’t have any idea. And it seems to be the same story throughout
any church.
“I feel bad for
you,” he laughed. “I am so glad I don’t
have to go through that ever again!”
We play our loyalties out. We let our fears win. We not only shut doors, we hammer them closed.
Someone could like you and you would never know it.
The truth of the matter is, maybe it doesn’t really
matter.
It doesn’t matter if there is absolutely no one at church
you’re interested in dating. To doubt
that God has the ability (and desire) to bring you a significant other is like
doubting His ability to
part the Red Sea.
What I’m saying is not that He will do it for you, but
that if it is truly in His will for you to be married you will not have to
change churches, move cities, or give online dating a go, because the same God
who rained manna from heaven, parted the Red Sea—what great big things He can
do, He can do great little things, too.
God cares about the little stuff, and not that your heart is a little
matter to God, because in fact He loves you very deeply, but if God can create
the universe, create you, then He can just as readily bring your spouse seemingly
out of thin air.
But only when the time is right. And only if it is in His will.
This is all, of course, to remember that the point of our
lives is not to be married (thank God), but that our lives are lived to glorify
Him.
Whether or not we do that single or married, well,
that’s all up to Him. And we are to
rejoice and invest in whatever He may give us.
As Bryan has recently been saying, “The grass ain’t
always greener on the other side—it’s greener where you water it.”
So, where are you watering?
 |
| Instead take it and open the doors which God has placed before you. |
