I don’t make resolutions.
Because I can’t keep resolutions.
But with my depression, along with my desire to do something with my life, to be closer to God, to be healthier, is
the cause for this most recent upheaval.
I spend a lot. A
lot more than I’d ever like admit.
Pastors at church have said this many times, that we “don’t
ever get rid of idol; we replace it with something else.”
With the OYC in place last year, I believe my new idol
became spending. Money. Consumerism.
A dangerous territory for a girl living in the realm of poverty.
And yet, because of my habit to consume, I bought the
book anyway.
And I’m really glad I did.
What started out with skepticism ended with awe, and a
challenging new perspective. Touching on
true love for Jesus, and a plight with consumerism, current in our
entanglements with spending, clothes, media, Jen touches on all the things I’ve
let feed on my life—or, really, what I’ve been feeding on instead of the light
of Jesus.
Jen—and her three children and one husband, to boot—lived
radically for seven months.
There are many reasons I relate to this book. She’s a woman. She’s American (AKA CONSUMER). Her background of leaving a theme-park church
and beginning a church with missions akin to that of our Fellowship. A challenge to those reading the gospel
without ever really living it out.
I was challenged.
I am challenged.
I want to live
differently. And there are many aspects
of a simplified life that give me great anxiety. My possessions are screaming at me from their
shelves to not overreact. We’ve
bonded. These books, these clothes,
these 78 pairs of shoes (shoot me, how did this happen?!) are mine. All mine.
But how selfish have I been to collect, collect,
collect. Bred into the deepest parts of
my subconscious and not-so-subconscious, how misguided by American culture have
I been, led to continuously consume?
So we spend, spend; amass, amass; indulge, indulge item by item,
growing increasingly deaf to Jesus who described a simple life marked by
generosity and underconsumption…What if we are camels, on this side of the
needle, dangerously content with our fake gospel and avoiding the actual
Christian life described in Scripture?...Could we be countercultural enough to
say, “We’re not buying that. We don’t
need that. We’ll make do with what we
have. We’ll use the stuff we already
own.”
I don’t want to be a camel on the wrong side of the
needle. Make me a donkey, God, anything,
but not the camel! I don’t have my
resolution worked out, tinkered down to a T, but this much I know I want:
We can simply stop
spending so much, use what we have, borrow what we need, repurpose possessions
instead of replacing them, and—the kicker—live with less.
Live with less.
Anti-consumer.
Is it possible? It
is and it is what I want for my life.
Give me a road map, Jesus.
